the crooked thing
by emletish
Summary: Katara and Zuko have a thing. a thing that they do. in the early days of Zuko's reign, they have to keep the thing a secret. Zuko has too many feelings about the thing, but he doesn't have a name for it. but he finds one in the end. shameless, fluffy smut


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The crooked thing.

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* * *

I whispered, 'I am too young,'

And then, 'I am old enough';

Wherefore I threw a penny

To find out if I might love.

'Go and love, go and love, young man,

If the lady be young and fair.'

Ah, penny, brown penny, brown penny,

I am looped in the loops of her hair.

O love is the crooked thing,

There is nobody wise enough

To find out all that is in it,

For he would be thinking of love

Till the stars had run away

And the shadows eaten the moon.

Ah, penny, brown penny, brown penny, One cannot begin it too soon.

W.B. Yeats.

* * *

The thing started during monsoon season. Everybody in the firenation knew the monsoons made people crazy. It was something to do with how the air felt electric almost, felt like it was holding its breath in anticipation, before the downpour. It made people think anything was possible, made people do stupid things that they weren't meant to do, just because they couldn't help themselves and they were in love.

* * *

It was just meant to be a one time thing.

But it was a one time thing which then grew. Expanded. Way beyond the borders of one-time-thing-land and into completely uncharted territory. The problem with this particular one time thing was that it had turned into an many-times-in-many-different positions thing. It could now never go back to being a one time thing, because after the thirtieth time Zuko stopped counting. Perhaps it could be a hundred and one time thing, but it would never be a one time thing again. And if he was completely honest with himself, Zuko kinda knew that he would have never been able to content himself with one time doing _this thing._ Once he tried _this thing_ with Katara, it seemed inconceivable that they'd never do _that thing_ again, because doing _that thing_ together was friggin awesome – they were both in agreement on this.

He wasn't even sure what _this thing_ between them was. What should he call it? A one time thing that took a wrong turn somewhere...and Autumn fling that just kept going...friends with amazing benefits...a relationship.._.the best thing that had ever happened to him?_ Katara said they should just take it as it comes for the moment and just call it a thing, a thing between them, a thing they did. Their thing was unique and rare and special and didn't need labels. So Zuko called it a thing (even though he was still leaning towards calling it the best thing to ever happen to him).

Perhaps _thing_ was a good word for it. He didn't really have a word for what Katara was to him. He didn't think that word had been invented yet. She was more than a girlfriend. Girlfriend didn't cover how much he wanted her and needed her. Girlfriend was too casual. Lover was too explicit – it wasn't just about doing _the thing _together. Lover didn't cover how much he adored her, no loved her – he hadn't been able to say it out loud yet, but he knew it. He hoped Katara did too, she always seemed to understand what he was trying to say without him having to make a prat of himself trying to say it. Lover didn't cover the fact that she meant more to him than any person in the world. That he would gladly jump in front of lightning again for her. That he couldn't imagine his life without her and he didn't want to.

One day he and Katara were just friends who didn't do _that thing_ (though he did fantasise a great deal about doing_ that thing _with her), and the next minute, it was all about _the thing! _They snuck off and did the thing everyday and everyday, for that brief, wonderful, hard-won slice of time that he could spend just with her, and it was just the two of them and nobody else, Zuko felt...happy. He was almost sure this was happiness. He'd never quite felt like this. With Katara, he felt solace and comfort and joy and peace. He felt calm, mostly, except for the very notable occasions when he didn't feel calm and those notable occasions where a whole lot of fun too.

Katara, Sokka, Suki, Aang and Hakoda lived in one of the villas that had belonged to former General Buijing (he had since been stripped of his title and was wanted to stand trial for crimes against humanity – Jun was hunting him and various other war criminals down for an exorbitant fee.) General Buijing's villa had been the nicest (that's why Zuko wanted Sokka and Katara to have it – if they couldn't live in the palace, they could at least live somewhere absolutely luxurious.) All his advisors said it looked bad to have water tribe people, Kyoshi islanders and the Avatar living in the palace, on top of all the recent changes and upheavals. There was only so much change the firenation could take at a time.

Curiously, his advisors accepted Toph's presence at the palace quite easily, which gave Zuko hope that eventually they'd accept other people too. They, in fact, though Toph was 'a great asset to the nation'. Possibly because Toph was the greatest (and only) metal bender the world had ever seen, and possibly because Toph herself was already very posh and came from an exorbitantly, extravagantly wealthy and influential earth kingdom family. Uncle had arranged a sort of foster system thing with Toph parents that used to be all the rage in the old days and the advisors though it was a good thing to 'rebuild bridges with the earth kingdom' but mostly they wanted to rebuild some bridges to the vast wealth and trading connections of the Bei Fongs.

The councillors and advisors position annoyed Zuko and he had been riled and was well set to be stubborn and dig his heels in so that the rest of the Gaang could stay in the palace. Then Uncle came up with the solution of just moving them to the newly available villa (scrubbed clean of all its previously occupant's belongings). Everyone could have their own room and be away from all the hustle and bustle of the palace, but still close enough to be bothered frequently by Uncle, looking for Pai Sho partners/ people to feed new experimental blends of tea to. The others liked the villa well enough and everyone said they really didn't mind, very nicely and Uncle said (less nicely and more matter-of-factly) that Zuko would have to pick his battles and it really wasn't worth pissing everybody off, jeopardising the peace process etc over sleeping arrangements. So in the interest of peace and not seriously pissing people off when he'd only been Firelord a few months, his best friends moved just across the way.

It ended up being the best move ever.

Katara had picked her own room all the way at the other end of the house. Her new room had become like their private sanctuary. There were not many servants, and certainly none that would pass idly by and then gossip. Zuko had offered several servants, but Hakoda felt 'weird' have someone dress him etc and so the number of servants was cut back. It must be said that Hakoda did not have the same reservations about having Ling cook for him, so they still had a (fabulous) cook and a housekeeper and a few other people, but mostly, if Zuko and Katara wanted privacy (and frequently they did) it wasn't hard to find at quiet place at her villa (at the palace it was nigh on impossible to get even a moments peace)

They had been trying to keep _the thing _a secret. Something just between them. If the advisors thought the firenation wasn't ready to have Katara (just platonically) living at the palace, Zuko imagined they keel over at the prospect of .._the thing_. Also the firenation, in general, was really into gossip and Zuko didn't want _the thing_ to become gossip fodder- to be belittled and mocked. T_he thing_ was private. _The thing _was special. _The thing _made him happy and he was very protective of _the thing_. He wanted_ the thing _to continue for however long it could. He didn't even know the average lifespan of _a thing, _but he hoped t_his thing_ lasted forever.

When_ the thing_ first started, Zuko will admit that he occasionally felt the urge to say _screw it, lets tell everyone._ Katara was making him happier than he had been ever **in his entire life** and he wanted everyone to know that she was the world's most amazing person. He wasn't ashamed of _the thing_, he wasn't ashamed of them. But Katara had been more reasonable about the whole _thing _thing, and said it would be best to keep it on the down-low for at least a little while. Katara herself wasn't ready to deal with all that snotty, poffy stuff and all the inevitable shenanigans that would come with them publicly announcing _their thing._ She also wasn't ready to deal with Sokka, who she was sure would be disgustingly smug about the whole thing. So practically every night, Zuko would use all his stealth (and several underground passages) and nip over and visit Katara. He'd climb the tree outside her window and she's let him in and then it would just be the two of them and nobody else. No distractions. Not interruptions. Just them.

And much fun was had by all.

* * *

They had been pretty good at keeping _their thing_ a secret so far.

But Zuko had a suspicion that definitely Toph, at least, and probably his Uncle, both knew what was going on. He suspected this because they had started nodding knowingly at each other whenever Zuko got caught sneaking out and used one of his pathetic white lies to explain why he was sneaking out. Damn Toph's earthbend-y senses! Zuko was under the impression that Toph liked to catch him out, just because she enjoyed putting him on the spot. She would find him and call Uncle over and Zuko would give an (often lame, rarely believable) excuse and they would nod. Knowingly. Smugly. Happily.

They had also stopped nagging him about his love life. While Zuko considered this a blessing, it was rather unusual. For the entire duration of his brief (disaster and argument filled) courtship with Mai, Zuko's love life-and how to fix it had been (up until _the thing_ started) **their absolute favourite topic of conversation.** They would talk about it over lunch, over tea, over dinner and over the top of Zuko's protests that they change the subject.

As soon as _the thing_ started, Toph and Uncle's conversations about Zuko's love life and how to fix it promptly stopped and the smug looks began. But the smug looks were infinitely less annoying than the constant conversations about his love life, so Zuko let the smug looks slide. Conversations normally followed a similar pattern. Toph would started bluntly and say _Honestly Zuko, all me and Uncle are saying is that __**Mai sucks**__, and you can do bette_r- _I'm am not saying __**exactly that**__, nephew but...-But you're not disagreeing either_ (Uncle wasn't disagreeing, but he would never use the word 'sucks' to describe someone)_ – I am only saying that you have to look within yourself and find the other self that balances yourself and then your two selves will be as one self – huh?_ (this was often said by both Toph and Zuko). Then everyone was treated to one of Uncle's long and lengthy anecdotes/fables/poems about love. Uncle tendency to talk in (very deep and probable meaningful) riddles carried over all subjects. Including Zuko's love life.

The lengthy speeches were not entirely useless. Zuko was trying to listen to and appreciate his uncle better and he had learned from one of these anecdotes that turtleducks mate for life. He had not previously know this and considered it interesting trivia. It was the sort of fact that would never be of any practical use, but still, it was a nice thing to know. (He'd told Katara that night, afterwards, when they were just a big pile of cuddly limbs and she'd sighed happily and said _maybe we were turtleducks in a past life _while she absent mindedly traced patterns on his chest with her finger (Zuko loved it when she did that). It made his stomach flip happily when she said that. They hadn't really talked about the future, not yet, but Katara's offhand comment surely meant that she was feeling the same way he was. He said he'd love to be a turtleduck with her and was teased gently for being ridiculously cheesy, but she then gave him a passionate kiss and she ran her hands all through his hair and she only did that when she was really pleased with him.

* * *

What also stopped was Toph's tendency to lock him and Katara in a room together and Just. Leave. Them. Sometimes for hours at a time. In the awkward period when Zuko had just broken up with Mai (for the fourth and last time) but the thing hadn't started yet, Toph seemed to do nothing but think of ways how to trap them in small confined spaces together. This annoyed Zuko at the start. Zuko had shit to do! He couldn't spend all day locked in a cupboard.

Zuko and Katara would always find a way to pass the time, but probably not in the way Toph hoped they would. They would talk, about all the shenanigans he was dealing with as firelord (Katara would listen and offer sage/optimistic advice) about how much he wished to punch so and so in the face (Katara help him find a non-violent solution to the problem of so and so) and the best ways to help people in the post-war rebuilding effort (if Katara had been to the place, she would wrack her brain trying to remember it and what its particular problems were). Often they solved all the world's problems together in these long cupboard hours. If either of them had infinite powers all these problems would be solved. Zuko did not have infinite power, but he had though being firelord would have been more fun than it was. It was problems and stress and bickering politicians and pettiness and trying to keep his temper Every. Single. Day.

Zuko had a lot to say, but often he preferred to listen to Katara talk about all the things she was trying out now, her ideas and hopes for the future. Back in the South Pole, she'd never really had options about what she wanted to do with her time, just an endless grind of chores. But now her possibilities were endless.

She wanted to do so much. She was currently trying to learn more advanced healing techniques. She corresponded frequently with Yugoda (the woman who had taught her healing in the north) and had been observing and helping Dr Yang (the royal physician) as he treated some of the recovering wounded soldiers and casualties of war. She was trying to integrate both Firenation and watertribe healing techniques. Eventually she wanted to study under an earthkingdom physician as well to see what she could learn from them. (the idea made his heart lurch a little, but he felt that lurch whenever he thought about being apart from her.)

She wanted to help in negotiations and peace settlements (Katara was great at this actually, her knack for giving speeches and inspiring people really came in handy sometimes, she got people to agree to things before they were even sure what they were agreeing too – people would get that caught up in her words). She was really into the idea of establishing some sort of forum for uniting the nations-a place where all the nations could meet and diplomatically discuss the challenges and issues that faced the world as a whole, now that the world was over and rebuilding commencing. She got a bit excited about this actually and she imagined this forum would have a big humanitarian branch, (naturally she always imagined herself in a position of power within this humanitarian branch).

She talked like anything was possible. She made Zuko believe it too.

When Toph would return and let them out, she'd be a bit frustrated with them and would tell them both that they were absolute idiots (or variations on that theme) and then she'd go play Pai Sho with Iroh (his Uncle had gotten a special set made up for her) and they would Gossip. For. Hours. Presumably about his love life.

Now that Zuko thought about it. It was probably Toph's weird way of trying to get them together (she had dropped many not very subtle hints in their many (oh so many) conversations about his love life, and Zuko knew she would support him and Katara if they ever were to announce _their thing._ Still, her behaviour at the time had perplexed and irritated him greatly. He had once, very ill-advisedly, threatened to send her back to her parents in Gaoling, if she didn't quit it (He wouldn't. He never would, but she was just being so annoying). Zuko did not make that mistake a second time.

It made sense in hindsight though, all the door locking. It was probably why she was so grumpy because whenever she came back, nothing would have happened between them. If he could go back in time, instead of getting grumpy with Toph, he would have told her to just give it time. She was trying to force it. And you couldn't force something as beautiful as _the thing. _

* * *

He'd taken out his top knot and dressed in his ninja outfit, and climbed up to Katara's room, silent as a shadow and tapped on her window lightly. She got up from her desk happily and raced over and let him in. As soon as he had both legs over the sill, she took his face in her hands and kissed him fervently, passionately, with her tongue, darting between his teeth in exploration while her hands roamed all over his body. She'd had a good day.

He could tell what sort of day she'd had by how she greeted him. Mostly she would fling herself at him and kiss him and grope him and they'd be tender and...dare he say it...playful with each other. They'd make love quietly so that no one would overhear them and Katara would make the most delicious soft moans that she tried to stifle but couldn't. Zuko wished they didn't have to be so secretive so she could make as much noise as she liked.

Sometimes, on these nights, they'd have little play tickling fights, or sometimes Katara would run her healing hands all over his body and it was such a blissful feeling, he'd tried to reciprocate. He'd warm his hands and give her a slow deep massage while she made soft appreciative noises. He tried to rub warmth into as much of her as possible. He'd never really given anyone a massage before (Mai hadn't been into it) but he was learning. Katara was a good teacher. She was right about the gentle encouragement thing. She gently encouraged him to do all the things to her that she really liked (they had fun finding out what these things were together) and Zuko was an eager student. He only wanted to make her happy after all.

Katara seemed to feel the same way about him. By this stage, the thing was a season old and she knew everything he liked. She knew exactly what to do to have him stifling back gasps of pleasure and profanities. She knew that kissing his neck in that way made him just a pile of goo in her hands. So she made a point kiss it frequently. She knew that he loved the way she dragged her hands up and down his back while they made love, so she also did this all the time.

Zuko would kiss her everywhere, all over her beautiful brown skin. Such a contrast to his own stark paleness. He'd caress her body in all the places she liked, her breasts, her nipples and finally down between her legs. He'd slide his fingers into her most secret place. They had a couple of pet names for it but his most favourite was the fun zone. Katara had called it the fun zone once, accidentally and absent-mindedly and had been a bit embarrassed, but Zuko laughed and kissed her and said it was the most appropriate name he could think of. The name had stuck. (however now in meetings when the word _zone_ was used quite frequently, Zuko's mind would wander off and he's start daydreaming about Katara's fun zone and then he'd grin widely and happily and that wasn't always appropriate in very serious meetings about demilitarised zones and other such matters.)

He'd slide his fingers into the fun zone and the soft, waiting flesh there. He stroked Katara on the insides. He found the sensitive spot that she just loved to be touched and he caressed and stroked until she bit him playfully on the shoulder and then harder to stifle the noises she made as she came. Zuko always liked to be sure that Katara had a good time first, before they moved onto other things.

Sometimes she would tease him and let him do everything but...until he thought he was going to pop with lust and anticipation and excitement and frustration. She would declare herself the boss for a night and she'd stroke him and suck him and use her hands and _spirits _sometimes even her bending to bring him to the brink...only to back down at the last minute and leave him a bit of sad panda. But she always came back for more, greedily and coquettishly. She enjoyed having such an affect on him, such power over him. When Zuko thought he couldn't take any more she'd push him back down on the bed and kissing him lovingly and he'd forgive her all her teasing. She'd straddle him and very slowly she'd mount him (Katara was always on top on nights when she was the boss) and lower herself onto his length, til he was fully inside her. He loved being inside her.

Other times, she'd let Zuko be in charge, demand he be in charge, (which kind of defeated the purpose of being in charge – but that was what having _a thing_ with Katara was like). Zuko liked to retaliate for all her teasing on the nights when she was boss. He'd finger her and go down on her until she was just making incoherent noises and urgent whispered demands for him to stop messing about and just_**do her**_ already. Then he'd make her wait just a little longer. He'd kiss up her body, gently caressing her nipples with his tongue (she shuddered delightfully when he did that and just made _the sexiest moan_). She'd grind her hips impatiently underneath him, until he slid into her. When Zuko was on top, they often looked each other in the eyes at this moment, right as he came into her and they were completely together. As close as two people could be. Gold eyes met blue and for a few seconds they'd be quiet and there would just be this moment between them. Full of unspoken promises. And then they'd move together until they both reached their climax.

Sometimes neither of them were the boss and they would experiment, with positions, with their bodies, with their bendings. _Spirits_, some of the nights when they got their bending involved. All these nights were wonderful. There was a give and a take between them. A balance. A dance. Their bodies moved together in a joyous rhythm that they were both learning, but it felt like they'd always known it. It felt like they fit together perfectly. Like puzzle pieces.

Other nights, much more rarely, If she'd had a bad day, the kind of day that had horrible people in it, people that made her angry (and made Zuko want to hit them), she would have all this pent up energy. On the angry days, she would kiss him fiercely, and undress him quickly and throw him on the bed and want to do it right then. Hard and fast and aggressive. It had confused Zuko the first time it happened, but he wasn't unwilling. He would have let her do anything to him.

He liked foreplay, he liked to kiss Katara all over her body, he liked to make her quake and quiver, he liked to know that Katara was having a good time as well. He was worried he would hurt her without it. But she would have them both naked in seconds (how did she do that?) and he'd take her, hard and fast, as per her wishes, slamming into her while she clenched herself tighter around him and quietly whispered her demands in his ear, _harder faster, oh god yes, right there, don't stop._

Other times, even rarer still, she'd be sad. The first time this happened was when one of her patients had died. Zuko had climbed in the window and she hadn't even gotten up but raised her tear stained face to him and burst forth anew. Zuko'd ran to her and put his arm around her and she'd cried all over his shoulder while he tried to sooth her. Slowly, between hiccups and bouts of crying, the story came out. Despite the best efforts of her and Dr Yang, the child suffering from chemical inhalation from living to close to one of the (now decomissioned) factories had passed. His lungs had something wrong with them to begin with, he'd had what his local doctor thought was asthma as a child (but it had been something much more sinister and deadly) and breathing in those fumes everyday hadn't done those already damaged lungs any favours. Katara had gotten attached to him, (she always got attached). He'd been a war orphan and even though she didn't say it, Zuko was pretty sure she'd been harbouring some mad fantasies about adopting him and bringing him home to live in the villa with her.

The boy'd coughed and struggled and wheezed through the days while Katara did her best and held his hand and sang to him. Dr Yang, a good doctor, but very blunt -in a way that Katara found hard to deal with, said that there was no point doing anything except trying to make the kid comfortable and ease his passing. There was nothing they could do. He'd seen cases like this before. The boy was dying a little more everyday. Katara hadn't believed him, had tried everything she could, but today she finally had to let the boy go. He'd clung to her hand the whole time, he'd been scared, he missed his mother, but he would be joining her soon so he wasn't sad.

That night they didn't make love, but Zuko held her while she cried and she cried a lot. She had such a big heart and it hurt her is such a big way when she couldn't help, when all her healing and good wishes didn't make a difference. It hurt Zuko to see her so sad and he felt the pain deep in his chest. They'd lain down on the bed and Zuko'd held her tightly and rubbed her back and repeated over and over, that he was so so sorry, that she was wonderful and did everything she could and she helped ease his passing a little and she was a brilliant healer and sometimes these things happen and he was so sorry. He whispered in her ear until her sobs subsided and she fell asleep wrapped around him. He stayed with her all the night and gave her a gentle kiss as he left, just before the sun rose. He had to be extra careful sneaking back, but it had been worth it. It had been the first time he'd stayed the whole night. After that he ended up staying practically every night.

A few times, he had been sad. He would have had a bad day. Normally when things didn't go his way he used to get angry and have a tantrum – but he couldn't do the tantrum thing now that he was firelord and had responsibilities and shit. It was undignified and unproductive. Still, some things got to him. And he found, more often than not, he'd have a mope instead of having an tantrum.

The mega mopes only happened on **really bad days.** Most days he'd go to Katara's and they'd make love and she'd hold him until whatever it was didn't matter any more. Or they'd talk it out in quiet whispers, until he felt like he had a sensible solution to the problem. But some days he thought he just couldn't face seeing anyone and he just wanted to be alone. He would have have visited Azula and she would have been having a Very. Bad. Day. Or He'd have found out some other heartbreaking family secret, or some horrific war crime that made him think that maybe the world really was a terrible place if that sort of thing could happen.

He knew he wouldn't be good company on those nights and so he stayed in his room. Katara, unfailing, would come to him. All dressed in black, like a ninja, she'd sneak out using all the stealth he taught her and she'd creep in. Just one look at her reminded Zuko that he was being stupid and he didn't have to deal with things on his own any more, didn't want to deal with things on his own any more. He could be sad or grumpy around her and she wouldn't leave him. Sure, she'd be initially cross (at being left waiting for so long). But then she'd take one look at him and understanding would flicker across her face. He'd peel her out of her clothes and kiss her everywhere and they'd be slow and gentle with each other.

In the morning, he woke with the sun and saw her sleeping next to him, in his bed and felt such a sense of rightness. This was how it should be every morning. He was getting tired of keeping _this thing_ between them a secret.

* * *

Monsoon season waned and the dry heat returned to the fire nation, _the thing _continued. Zuko hadn't realised it, but he had almost been waiting for this. For the other shoe to drop. He'd had a deep fear that _this thing_ was just the result of monsoon madness and Katara would get over it. She was a beautiful girl, she had other options, she didn't have to stay with him. Part of Zuko, the nervous, apprehensive, insecure part, whispered to him in a voice that sounded like Ozai's, that _She'd leave him one day. After all, who would want to put up with him for a long period of time. Even his mother left him. _But then Katara would kiss him and the voice would be silenced.

* * *

It was amazing they hadn't been caught yet really. Zuko knew, somewhere in the pit of his stomach, that this little world they'd created form themselves, for just the two of them, at night, couldn't last forever. One day they'd be caught and then the secret would be out and it wouldn't be just the two of them, in secret any more. Everyone would know and gossip and there'd be shenanigans from the nobles and drama from the politicians and he'd probably get a very stern talking to/awkward conversation with Hakoda. Aang would probably get pissed off. Toph would be disgustingly smug. His Uncle would urge them to make grandneices and nephews and probably, knowing Zuko's luck, drunkenly tell Katara all the names he had picked out for said imaginary grandneices and nephews. He had drunkenly told Zuko this a few days ago (Uncle had it all planned, Zuko would have seven children and Uncle had named them all). Zuko had kept the particulars of this drunken rambling speech to himself. Normally he told Katara everything, but he didn't think she appreciate being told that Uncle wanted her to have seven children and to name them all after teas. What kind of names were _Oolong _and _lapsang_ anyway?

Even though telling everyone would lead to hassles and drama. He kind of thought, sometimes, just to himself, that it would be more than worth it, if he got to hold Katara's hand, proudly, in the broad light of day, instead of secretively in the cover of darkness. He knew it was for the best if they kept this thing a secret, but waiting till everyone was asleep and then sneaking back and forth every night and morning was eventually going to trip him up. He was good, he was stealthy, but he knew Toph and Uncle were on to him. He was staying longer at her house, because every morning he found it harder to leave her. Once they started sleeping together, instead of just, you know, sleeping together – he'd gotten used to her sleeping form next to him. She was a hairy cuddly pentapus and a blanket thief and he loved her anyway. Apparently he was a restless sleeper and a kicker and she loved him anyway.

* * *

Zuko still didn't have a name for _this thing _between them, for what Katara was to him. But sometimes, in his more whimsical moments, He entertained the possibility that maybe the spirits could be kind as well as cruel, and maybe some things are meant to be, and maybe there is a matching person for everybody out there, even someone like him. He was never going to perfect and neither was Katara, they were both flawed and had difficult tendencies and annoying habits. But together, they just made so much sense. They just fit. They might be opposites in many respects, but they balanced each other out so perfectly. They were different, but deep down they were so similar.

Zuko hadn't felt incomplete exactly, before he started _this thing_ with her, but that was just because he didn't know he would feel this whole and healthy and happy with her by his side. He looked at her sleeping next to him in the moonlight and gave her a light kiss on her forehead and whispered the three words that he always tried to say to her when she was awake, but never quite managed. A soft whispered _I love you. _She stirred a little and mumbled _love you too _and gave him a little squeeze and went back to sleep. Zuko was still for a moment he had thought she was sound asleep, he hadn't thought she'd hear him, he probably wouldn't have been brave enough to say it if he knew she could hear him. He certainly hadn't expected her to respond, with sleepy certainty. His belly gave a lurch of pure surprised joy.

He didn't have a word for _this thing_ between him, but he knew _the thing_ made him happy, made him feel complete and calm and content. He wasn't sure if he believed in soulmates, but if he was the sort of person to believe in that sort of thing, if there even was such a thing as soulmates, he knew Katara would be his.

* * *

Authors note: short, but still rambly.

MERRY CHRISTMAS EVEYONE!

And

Long live the thing!

So this is my Christmas present to all my lovely readers, but especially moonspirityang, who asked me (many moons ago) to try my hand at smut where our dynamic duo did the squelchy for her birthday. Well happy belated birthday lovely, or early merry Christmas. Anyway I have never written smut before, so when I sat down to write this all this other stuff came out.

I tried to just write the sexy, I really did, (because I imagine Zuko and Katara would have epic sexy times- so epic that I'm sure Zuko would be one of the few exceptions to the Sock Gap rule. Katara would let the sock gap slide). Anyway I tried to just write the sexy times, but instead this long soppy piece about _their thing_ came out. And I couldn't stop adding context to the thing. And it came from Zuko's POV which was surprising because I have kind of gotten used to Katara's "voice." I think that Zuko is a closest hopeless romantic. Under that hard shell he's just full of smushy feelings and soft stuff.

But YMMV

anyway, it's not all smut, but I hope you aren't disappointed.

So there's a bit of smut in the middle, but it's more on of my ideas about how I see their relationship going, if they had to keep in a secret. It's a popular idea in fic that Zuko and Katara have to have a secret relationship in the firenation, especially in the early days of Zuko's reign. This fic is my take on that.

I think that once they started with the sexy it would have been hard to stop, because they would have incredible chemistry and they are horny teenagers and these things happen. I haven't included the first time because I have ideas for that and those of you reading my _stalking series_ will have to be patient before you get to read that. So they would have fallen into a sneaky ninja pattern of sneaking into each other's rooms, but would have more frequently used Katara's because it would have been more private/ easier.

Toph is staying with the Royals under the very medieval foster system and has become very much a little sister from another mother to Zuko. She even annoys him like all good little sisters should (but he still loves her). The first draft of this fic had a lot more Azula in it, but she was kind of crazy and a bit depressing so her part got chopped. Sorry Azula.

Got the idea of Katara and Zuko calling their relationship "a thing" from the lovely Em Dixon's fic "When we were young." if you haven't read this delightful fic, go read it! It's great and she is much better at writing the sexytimes than I am. But I like the idea that they wouldn't really know what to call it or label it and would perhaps not want to label _the thing_ anyway. I think especially in the early stages of their relationship, it makes sense that they wouldn't know what to call it or what they are to each other. I think with very strong friendships that turn into relationships, they often get quite intense quite quickly because the two people have already done all that getting-to-know-you stuff and there has normally been an arse-ton on UST prior to getting together.

Got the title from W.B Yeats poem, which I discovered while watching "must love dogs". Harmless, fluffy rom-com, that is worth the price of entry just to see Christopher Plummer's epic recital of W.B Yeats' poem "Brown penny". W.B. Yeats also gets posthumous bonus points from me for mentioning hair loopies in a love poem.

Merry Christmas to all and to all a good night!


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